Much to my chagrin I must admit I went a little overboard on vinyl acquisitions recently but nothing too dangerous.
I found most of System of a Down‘s discography for a decent price. Eventually I do plan on getting their first album. What I do have here though is all pretty great. Thinking about whether or not to buy them made me realize just how consistently good SoaD is. They have a distinct sound that drastically evolved across their releases, with each album being listenable all the through.
Pretty self-explanatory, the soundtrack for Banjo-Tooie. I have the OST (or is score the more appropriate word?) for Banjo-Kazooie already so this is a relief to have before it sells out. It actually came as a surprise, I was bored and checked Fangamer and there it was on the first page, impulse beat logic and now here it is. I may end up doing a comparison of the two games OST’s included.
Beyond Creation is a band I’ve only discovered within the past year or so but their brand of technical ambient death metal is pretty palatable. I was introduced via their most recent album Algorythm and then worked backwards. I think Algorythm is more consistent while Earthborn Evolution has better moments.
Finally some pictures for albums i’ve previously mentioned (Archspire – Bleed the Future,Black Crown Initiate‘s – Song of the Crippled Bull and Selves We Cannot Forgive). Then Temple of Void‘s Lords of Death, an absolutely crushing death metal album with some inspired lyrical themes . It can be doomy, ambient, and even speed up to a gallop with some excellently placed clean vocals on one track. I’d really like to do a more in depth review of it some time. Next would beMichael Jackson‘s Thriller. Everyone’s heard the song. It’s one of the best-selling albums of all time at over 50 million copies. Yet I’d never listened to it front to back, let alone any of his music. It’s good 80’s pop, but i’ll have to listen more to form any strong opinions. Lastly we end with A Tribe Called Quest‘s Midnight Marauders, which is a great album with solid vibes all the way through.
If you’ve ever been to the American Midwest, you’d know that like all places it has an inimitable charm and beauty. Quaint it might be compared to something so grand as Everest or vast as the Grand Canyon but it’s still there. I always found it far from the cities, lost in the woods. To wander and chance upon someplace free from the burdens of civilization. The more work to get there, the more remote the better. The existence of such places a mystery until revealed. For me my father was the one who showed me the outdoors. Since I was young, we’d always camped in state parks or similar places which is fine but as I got older my dad started getting out more himself and thus began taking me too. Hiking, backpacking, kayaking, anything to be in the woods. There’s therapy in the whole process. Picking a site. Deciding trip length and time. What food to bring and what gear and how is it packed. It all comes together as you set out packs on your back. In the first few minutes your body will begin to ache, sweat, and you’ll begin having more labored breaths. Maybe a bit of doubt about well you’ll carry and how far. Then before you know it, the body’s warmed up and what seemed difficult has become natural. Everything’s been prepared it’s just walking the space between you and setting up camp.
On the first night you can have fresh meat or to keep it easy stay with dehydrated every time. Either your close to water and will filter or you packed enough in. Camp is set, the fire is starting to build, the sun is low in the sky leaving just enough light to see through a few feet of trees. You sit back satisfied with the work, drinking in the lack of so many noises. Here it’s the occasional animal crying or moving about, a bit of wind, the crackling fire and nothing else. Dinners getting started, and water’s set to boil for coffee, cocoa, or tea. You finish standing the tent getting any ground pads ready and take in the peace.
Or you find a cave that’s open to the public for spelunking. Some are short some are long but being underground stands out as an experience. The temperature hardly varies. There’s bound to be belly crawls, climbing, wading, and sometimes swimming to move through a route. Everythings muddy from a creek running along most of your route despite the recent lack of rain. Lights often pointed ahead to catch looming head injuries or kneecapping rocks. When you take a break and look around you see ancient formations with water dripping like crystals. Everythings brown but with different shades and shapes rendering each “room” distinct. Then just for fun you and any one your with all kill your headlamps and soak in the complete darkness.
Each trip is unique, but all can provide that sense of purgation, a cleansing of the soul. Every person needs this in some form; a method or methods of achieving catharsis. It could be binging movies, a hard workout, backpacking, or more whatever works and is healthy. So, if you have the need to get away find a local park, cave, beach, whatever and have a walkabout.
Take only pictures, leave only footprints and bring plenty of water.
I remember a casual afternoon at my parents’ house when some of the family had come over to visit. They’ve got enough yard space for the kids to play and my mom enjoys entertaining family and friends. Some family were talking with one of my older cousins and someone had asked “What do you want to do for job?” or something like that. I was in middle school at the time so he was probably in high school . His response was “to make video games” and as he went on about his answer, a lightbulb that I didn’t even know existed popped into existence and lit up at the same time. My cousin is still talking but I’m only half-listening as a line of thought crawls through my brain. I didn’t know you could do that or rather I’d never thought about it. I was aware of game developer’s, Blizzard was a favorite then, but had never considered it from the level of the individual. So right then and there I’d decided I’d do the same. Starting in high school and on through College that was the plan. This was how I got into software development and eventually picked Computer Science as my college major. My sophomore year I heard about a local group called Hoosier Games. I joined them and was shown how little I knew about anything. Somehow I was able to find an Internship for the summer at a local Software and game devolopment studio called Plow Digital / Plow Games located in downtown Indianapolis, Indiana. It was there I was given a crash course in Unity3D and spent the next few months cranking out digital game guides (I worked on the Street Figther IV guide), mobile games, custom interactive experiences, and probably more.
The experience at Plow was really big for me. I worked with a lot of cool, creative people who were unanimously both cordial and driven. They moved into a new office space shortly after I left and I haven’t kept up with them but they still seem to be doing pretty well. My experience there put me back at Hoosier Games but this time leading a small team of seven people to make Katabasis. This was everybody’s first game, and my first time leading a team. While it was never a perfect process I still remember the time fondly and wish the best for the team. We had myself and another who voluteered to code, an artist, and two musicians, while everybody helped with design. Most of the team persisted for a year but after two it became a solo act. Early on it took a while for the identity of the gameplay to come through but our artist had a very distinct style that worked great for the game. Our composers also put together some really interesting tracks. In fact just yesterday I was looking into custom vinyl presses of the game’s soundtrack as this year is it’s fifth anniversary.
The following summer I was able to get a job interning on Marvel’s Video Game Production team. I mainly helped the senior Producers with whatever project, so I bounced around to different games and ended up doing lots of QA and testing when possible. Not everything that came to our desk was a game build sometimes it’s concept art or in-game art, design documents, pitches, and more. Being an organizational nut I organized the spare office space and cleaned up the shared digital documentation. The latter was an extended effort to catalogue Marvel character’s first appearances and confirm other similar historical questions. While there I worked on a variety of projects like the yet-to-be released Spiderman for PS4 and some others. It was a great team but I never belonged, way too friendly and social. The position itself is also too people focused for me, but it did give me some managerial insight.
I would go on to continue on some other solo projects but had largely disconnected from Hoosier Games in my waning time as a college student. This was mostly due to some fortune in acquiring a position under one of the professors doing freelance game development. This position lasted about a year until it transitioned into Water Works, an educational game being developed through the IU School of Public and Environmental Affairs. This was a web-based game and thus a bit of a departure from my usual work. Not only that I was picking up what was left as someone else’s passion project. This was where the majority of my game development time went until I left college.
After moving out to California’s Bay Area to be closer to a couple of different studios I started interviewing around, trying to connect on LinkedIn, and doing contract work. I met some really nice people in the area who gave me some great advice but I eventually gave up and started pursuing my Plan B, Software Engineer. A silver lining I suppose.
Perhaps most kids who grew up enjoying games like I did also dreamed they would one day own as many games as they wanted. The proverbial “Kid in the Candy Shop” being able to walk away with everything. Well I certainly did and everytime I felt I had to sell off older games for newer ones that idea was given more fuel. Learning about emulation was a revelation and provided an accessible gateway but it’s alway felt off, not properly scratching that itch. Don’t get me wrong I think emulation is and will be a cornerstone of game preservation, but the disconnect from the physical process makes it feel hollow to me. I missed sliding a cart in, clicking an on switch and gripping a distinctive controller in my hands. Even just picking out what to play, the little game in your head to decide. There’s a ritual to it that adds to the experience, but for me even the feel of the controller is important. Playing Sega Genesis games requires the Genesis controller with it’s big, clicky buttons that make arcady games oh-so satisfying. Or even as simple as Super Mario Bros. on NES with buttons locations helping inform the gameplay. Nowadays it’s easy to get 3rd-party controllers for PC to imitate older controller designs which is also great. With just a decent PC you could emulate almost everything but more recent generation consoles while using faithful controllers. For me, clicking through an emulator menu just can’t replace grabbing something off of a shelf and physically turning on a system.
With my first full-time job I had finally achieved I decided to try and satisfy that childhood dream of owning any game I wanted. It all started when I had my recurring urge to play my favorite GBA games. Instead of emulating like I had since high school I bought a GBA SP and a few games. Then it dawned on me I could do more. I moved onto the N64, then a PS2, and more. I started keeping track of what I wanted in a spreadsheet as the possibilities opened up. Then the spreadsheet kept track of everything I had as the collection grew. After some more research you realize there’s better ways to get faithful HDMI signals with upscalers like the Framemeister. You can also use different types of cables for better signals. Signal switches can make using multiple consoles easier. If you have friends who’ll play you’ll want multiple controllers for the different consoles. But what about cleaning, maintaining and moving your collection. Discs and cartridges each require different cleaning solutions. Disc based consoles have internal or external memory units while cartridge games often have in-cart memory that requires replacing batteries on the board. Older consoles die, newer consoles fail. Discs will face rot. You want to move? How do you package and safely move all of it? Where does all of this go in your home after? You’ll need shelves, boxes, labels, or something. It’s expensive. It’s never ending. What was once a glorious childhood dream is now a burden that makes you question your adulthood.
Collecting quickly became a game unto itself. Finding recommendations to look out for, finding random picks wherever I may roam, the “it’s my birthday, so it’s ok if I buy a Model 1 Genesis in box”. Completing my list and adding new items to the shelf became more gratifying sometimes than some games. Same with upgrades to my media center. I’d update some things to improve accessibilty, flow, or usability but never access or use them. So not only do I have a bunch of fragile, non-liquid assets taking up a large amount of physical space, I felt guilty for not playing what I had, continuing to buy more, and not playing them.
Not mine, way too many 360 games.
Over time I’ve come to terms with my relationship with my collection. Even if I don’t engage with it as much as I think I should that doesn’t mean I won’t or can’t. In fact the point is that I do have them for whenever I may want to play them, not to play them all right now. Sometimes you have to be in the right mood for a particular experience or take a chance to experience a new one. In the end the boundaries and expectations are yours to control, you just have to be honest with yourself and wise enough to know when you’ve gone too far. It’s your collection, you decide. For me, just because I don’t play Super Nintendo every day doesn’t mean I should sell off my copy of Tetris Attack.
Any day now I’m going to come home from the hospital with a baby girl as a new father. I feel anxious, excited, afraid, curious, and more. For the moment I’m just double checking everything, trying to keep the house clean, and my wife happy. My wife is ready to no longer carry a watermelon-sized person around her belly also. This has been the largest reason I’ve not found the time or motivation to write much of anything. Even now the words come only with much focus and thought to wring out something. Anticipation has always had a way of staying under my skin, making me overwhelmingly anxious. For relief I always end up going over all the details, even the only mildly related ones. The nursery is setup, I’ve re-organized the garage, re-evaluated and sold off part of my video game collection, re-organized and cleaned the kitchen, and put some finishing touches into my gardens. I think I’m feeling the end of this chapter of my life and I’m trying to finish what I can so I can start the next as unburdened as possible.
I have so much going on and so much to say this will probably be quite long, especially with some pictures. So it’s been broken up into pieces, mostly for my benefit. If you’re asking why I didn’t release smaller posts over time, that’s a good question.
Going forward I may talk about Zelda, my daughter, but only after confirming it’s ok with my partner. We’re almost at 41 weeks and my wife is ready to be done. Fortunately Zelda is for all intents and purposes in good health despite her late stay. Unfortunately we’ll have to wait for our local hospital to deliver a few other Summer babies before we can schedule an induction and a definitive end. One way or the other within a week I’ll be able to hold my newborn. My wife is abuzz with the possibilities for Zelda, whether she’ll be good at math, a natural swimmer or anti-social like her dad. How quickly will she learn to crawl and speak? Will she be noisy or quiet? Active or still? All I can hope to do is comfort her against all the possibilities and assure her Zelda will be fine.
Ironically by the time this post goes live, my daughter will have been born already. On July 4th close to midnight Zelda was born with no complications, and all the struggles my wife suffered for the past 40+ weeks melted into one of the biggest smiles I’ve ever seen her wear when they handed her this tiny, quiet, little girl. Two days later and we’ve taken the baby home for the first time. Here’s to a healthy baby and wife *drinks more caffeine*.
The Wife
Wild salmon, fingerling potatoes, and green salad.
My wife has found the dwindling end of our non-parent life together pre-occupying her mind. As a balm I suggested a long list of ideas for “Dates”, with extra attention to her limitations in pregnancy. While we were unable to do all of them we did knock off quite a few and having this list to work through made planning a fun day quicker.
Dinner for two by candlelight
Bake desserts and make ice cream sundaes
Picnic
Work on some artwork together
Day trip to an interesting nearby city
Try a board game, card game, or video game
Faux camping in the backyard with smores and grilled food
Watch a movie at the Drive-in
Food crawl through a town
Dinner at a nice restaraunt
“Movie Theatre” at home
Pictured below we were able to complete a “Paint-by-numbers” on canvas that we are now deciding where to hang. Most likely in the nursery.
The final product of our collaboration.
The next we were able to do was try Anti-monopoly, a variation on the classic board game. It was the first time in a few years we had played a board game or anything like that together. On occasion she’s willing to play the video game Overcooked with me and it’s a bit of chaotic fun. We were also able to catch Everything Everywhere All at Once at a nearby Drive-in Theatre. We grabbed some mexican take-out and had a great time gorging and watching. Earlier in the year we had driven north to Napa, CA (the city not the county) where we roamed around taking in the sights and eating at a few places, this is the closest we got to a true food crawl. When I first moved out to California my wife and I were not married yet and were actually taking a break from each other. We eventually met for dinner at a nice local italian place and re-kindled our relationship that night. I was hoping we could go one last time before parenthood and we may still but it seems we won’t. Lastly my wife had received a small projector as a gift from work and with some tinkering I was able to setup our spare bedroom into a “home movie theatre”. The projection’s image is rather grainy but sharp enough for subtitles, a must for my wife. For our movie night I suggested The Grand Budapest Hotel, something we had meant to watch together for some time. This was my second viewing and her first. It’s a pretty fascinating movie with lots of stuff bubbling beneath the surface, she enjoyed it quite a bit so I’ve moved onto my next recommendation for her, Catch Me If You Can also a hit. Even though we worked through half the list we hit a point where we knew even amongst those limited options, our choices were fewer each day.
Just a funny aside, we have a local pizzeria that serves a “Prego” pizza. One that is claimed to help start labor, and my wife anxious to get things going advocated for it’s consumption. So I pickup what is essentially a combo pizza with extra onions, pepper, and linguisa added. She wasn’t a fan, she doesn’t like such “american” style pizzas so I’ve had pizza for lunch for almost a week now.
The Prego pizza
Myself
I’ve spent some time thinking about why I even have a blog and what purpose it serves. One conclusion is that being able to write about whatever I want with no real objective gives me the opportunity to organize my thoughts. Then in the writing of it I ask myself critical questions, which reveals more understanding. If nothing else having a place to speak even an empty room is conducive to my mental health and self-awareness. It’s my hope I’ll continue to think out loud and find more confidence in exposing more of my thoughts as I do so. Aside from my mental health I’ve taken a break from serious excercise to nurse a foot back into shape, but between an acceptable diet and limited activity I’ve lost another ten pounds in the past month. This makes 25+ pounds over two months. Down from 220+ to 195. The end of last month, June, was when I hit two months of no alcohol as well. Things are not perfect but I’m making the changes that I think are meaningful for now.
Video Games
Video game shelves
It’s weird that I feel so compelled to finalize things. Not only that but what I cared about or what mattered shifted quickly as the expected due date neared. This was most apparent with my intentions towards game collecting where I had streamlined my collection selling a good chunk of it. Cutting down on larger items like collectors editions and entire genres I’ve realized I just don’t like. Not only this but I bought plastic shells for all of my Nintendo paper game boxes as that finalized level of protection. In addition after a lot of shuffling around I’ve found a layout for my games that I find functionally effective and aesthetically pleasing. From the hookups for all my handhelds over on the left, to the ready-to-play PSOne between my genesis games, and everything else. I look at these shelves and see an interactive shrine to what gaming is to me. In an effort to make playing any of my consoles even easier I’ve started switching over to all wireless controllers. So far this covers the Genesis, SNES, and PS2 for the consoles that dont have first-party wireless controllers. So far it’s been pretty effective, I just need to document what combination of switches need to be activated for seamless component video out to my Retro-Tink 5x.
Vinyl
My vinyl setup
This push to tie the bow on my collecting also included my vinyl collection which saw two new additions with another three on the way. Most recently was The Black Dahlia Murder’s Ritual. I bought my first TBDM vinyl, Abyssmal a week or so before Trevor’s death and I had posted about not enjoying their recent music as much. I know I don’t have anything to do with what happened but it still left me with some guilt later. I only wish the best for those left behind. Continuing with the Death Metal I also picked up Black Crown Initiate‘s Song of the Crippled Bull and Selves We Cannot Forgive both excellent listens with a lot of variety, though I would like to say the former is more like one 21 minute long track that’s broken into four pieces. The latter goes to a lot of different places and most of the tracks have a clear identity picking only a few styles to blend each. The last Death Metal album is the newest release from Archspire who seem like a joke band because of how ridiculous some of what they do is, but every time I listen to their past two releases what I hear is some pretty great songwriting. Finally I was able to find an affordable copy of one my favorite 90’s east-coast hip-hop albums. It has this theme of a city bracing for a hurricane, the eponymous storm in the form of “Hurricane” Starang Wondah, Louieville Sluggah, and Top Dog.
For anyone curious about my setup, I’m using an AT-LP120XUSB so my audio is actually transmitted via bluetooth as I’m low on space for chords. At the moment I’m only outputting to a pair of decent Bose bookend speakers that’ve lasted me since High School. Given our house is mostly hardwood and vinyl planking the acoustics are exceptional and I can fill the whole house from downstairs at well less than half volume. My turntable accessories and stuff for cleaning are in the drawer just below the turntable, while replacement vinyl sleeves are on a shelf lower. My vinyl shelving was just some second-hand furntiure left by a friend of my wife’s. After having it for some time not knowing why this “book”shelf can’t hold books, it all clicked when I was looking where I could put my vinyl somewhere safe, accessible, and allowed for legible spines. I’m using some cheap metal bookends to keep the vinyl vertical and help with organization. Right now I have them organized into four sections Metal or Hip-Hop my wife doesn’t like on the top left, stuff I don’t listen to or damaged vinyl on the bottom left, video game soundtracks on the bottom right and everything else (jazz, rock, classical) is in the top right. Just for my vanity and because vinyl album covers are an art to themselves I bought a stand to display whatever’s playing.
ooglykraken 